People have been wondering for some time now who the new Ralph Macchio will be. They say: "Who?"
Well, I have the answer, and I'm going to share it. But I think it will come as a big surprise, so brace yourself.
I am the new Ralph Macchio.
Ralph knows already, and he's not happy about it. But so what. And maybe you're not happy either. But I'll tell you what I told him. I said: "Suck on this, Ralph."
He had his chance. It's my turn now.
It's my turn to be Ralph Macchio.